There are several reasons I'm in this course.
I want to be part of an online community.
I've been part of three day conferences and three week seminars. I think 17 weeks will be enough time to create a cohesive group. I like being part of a course to do this because here I give myself permission to learn in public. In the general blogosphere I want myself to be skilled before I do anything. I know our blogs within this course are public. I think the difference is that there is a finite, knowable, and supportive group that will respond to my writing. I know other people can read what I write and comment. But this community keeps me from having to speak into the void.
I want a community where I can reflect on my process of learning and responding.
I've been a life long learner since I can remember. I watched my Dad build our house when I was five. In the next few years, I explored fields and ponds, pollywogs and ground wasps, and reading books and writing . My family lived in . . . I stop myself because I think about anyone, any time reading what I write here. Do I want to type what I was thinking? My mother was afraid of. . . again I stop myself. What are the implications of telling what my mother was afraid of? She had her reasons for not wanting us to talk about our family's past. Even writing as vaguely as I am, I find myself shaking. I said earlier that I want to be perfect before I say anything in the blogosphere. I also get hung up about who might ever read what I write and what might happen because of it. I think I'm almost the exact opposite of young kids who put their pictures and their pain on MySpace and don't expect their parents or future employers to see it. I get tied in (k)nots before I can get out a sentence.
How do other people deal with this sense of who's out there? who's listening? Does anybody else get tangled like I do?
I want to go from learning on my own to being in a community that shares my excitement.
My idea of learning includes ideas and emotions. In the example above I think community will help me get perspective. I also want to build knowledge. I've done a little reading of people's posts on community; I'm really looking forward to clarifying and communicating my ideas in this forum. I've become fat from gorging myself on learning. Now I want to begin to master how to learn/create with others.